staring into space waiting for some kind of magic to fall upon my face. waiting for the crooked line of my smile to appear. there in so much im hiding from. under the surface everything is bubbling up. when i look in the mirrior i can see peace in my eyes at last. but other things have changed too. my bones show threw my skin, and im pale i feel fragile and emaciated. the bitterness of not being able to eat. the hole inside that i just wont fill. the gnawing isnt enough to draw me to the fridge, i wait and wait longer. i want to cry but tears have no more meanings.